rage against the flop

i'm back from a much needed mini-vacation in pasadena. i apologize to my faithful readers for the hiatus, but the pressures of providing quality content for the blog was just wearing me down. but seriously, the quarter is over and i'm done with school like things for a few weeks. anyways, on to my adventures this weekend.

saturday night, fredo and i went to the commerce casino in LA to play some poker. i actually did quite well and went home with an extra fifty dollars in my pocket. this is especially gratifying since at one point i was a hundred bucks down. but that pales in comparison to the other accomplishment that night, whipping zach de la rocha's ass.

this scrawny guy with a pretty nappy hairdo, half dreads-half afro, sits down at our table. i look at him and say, "has anyone ever told you that you look like zach de la rocha?" and he replies, "i get that all the time." after which he acts distinctly unfriendly. i guess that since we were playing poker that maybe he was not trying to give away his hands by remaining calm, but at it turns out, he was calm like a bomb, and played horribly. i probably took him for about twenty bucks. he was seeing everything, and paying to see the flop with some terrible hole cards. anyways, after about fifteen minutes, a guy comes up to our table, taps the scrawny guy's shoulder and says, "hey zack, there's a seat open at our table." my jaw drops as he gets up to leave. i just played poker with the former lead singer of rage against the machine.

anyways, it's real late and i'm getting tired, so i get up a few hands later, and make a beeline for zach. he's at a table near to the one fredo is playing at. i go up to him and the following exchange occurs.

me: hey man, i just wanted to say that i really dig your stuff.

zach: thanks man.

me: hey man, when is the new stuff going to come out? we've all been waiting for so long.

zach: it's coming, it's coming...

me: well good, cuz we really need it now. all right man, good luck tonight, and i'll be looking for the new stuff.

anyways, i really wish i would've realized that it was him when he was sitting at my table, because the ass-whipping would have been much greater. i would have asked even more assinine questions, like, "so who exactly are the people of the sun?" anyways, fredo and were talking about it, and we decided that this is one of the more egregious examples of an activist selling out. let's face it folks, playing poker is one of the more decidely pro-establishment things that you can be doing. i mean the gambling industry must deprive so many people of money that they could be using to feed their family, send their kids to better schools, and so on. and yet here is the lead singer of one of the most notable activist bands of all time playing along with the capitalist machine. what's even more f-ed up is that he was playing with us peons at the $2-$4 tables and not the higher stakes tables. i suppose that most of his money is caught up in "causes" or some dumb shit like that, but with the success of rage against the machine, fredo and i figured that this must be some way for him to connect with the people. anyways, i tried to get his picture with my cell phone camera, but he saw me and kept putting his hands up to his face so i couldn't get a good picture. what an a-hole. i should have said to myself, "fuck you i won't do what you tell me," but i decided that i had whipped his ass enough already, so i just gave up on it.

in any case, i now have twenty dollars of his money that would have no doubt gone to the table dancers that he and his flunkees were headed to see afterwards. in a sense, you could say that i was being the voice of the voiceless here. you could also say that whenever zach lost on the the river, that he was basically playing cards that were born of a broken hand. i could do this all night.

anyways, i also saw the life aquatic yesterday with helene and erik, so i'll post a review real soon.

*thanks to erik for helping me create the graphic


El Negro said...

The people of the sun are dark skinned people i.e. people of Mexican or Africa orgin who are continuesly skrewd by those of fair skin.

Bob said...

dear a-hole,

i know who the godammed people of the sun are. you clearly do not understand the concept of whipping someone's ass.

Anonymous said...

seriously, bob - not just screwed but skrewd. skrewd - as in, no fair-skin spelling for me, or once again, fuck you i won't do what you told me.

El Negro said...

No, its just that I didn't understand what a cock joke that was. Nice one dick.