bobby the gook season 3, preseason action part 4

well, here it is the final installment of the preseason preview. today, we go over the east divisions

AFC east
new england - 10.5: over(-115) under(-115)
vegas is right to be wary of this team. on the one hand, last year, the pats were good but very mortal, unlike the two previous years, and they've lost a ton of players this year to free agency. on the other hand, they're still the the patriots with belichick and tom brady. it's kinda like betting against walsh and montana or spouting anti-semitic rants during your DUI arrest...not a good idea. however, they didn't beat the number last year, and vegas has reduced it accordingly. add to the mix a 'phins team that is supposed to be better. however, they get the bills and jets twice plus houston, detroit, green bay, and tennesee. that means that they need 3 more wins from the rest of the schedule to get there. i hate doing this, but i'll take the over here.

miami - 9: over(-155) under(+125)
everyone's trendy preseason pick, including vegas'. this is the biggest spread on the money lines and it makes sense. last year, saban showed everyone that he is in fact, that good. the defense will be fine as it always is and the skill positions have underrated talent in ronnie brown and chris chambers. as usual, the big question mark is whether or not daunte culpepper can regain his touch. remember folks, he was having a piss-poor year before he went down, leading many, including yours truly to believe that his numbers were inflated by the presence of randy moss. add that a major leg injury and i feel that pencilling in these guys as contenders is not that easy. however, they're playing the same patsy schedule as the patriots, and instead of needing only 3 wins, they only need 2. this is a no brainer i think but horrible value on your bet. over.

buffalo - 6.5: over(even) under(-130)
new york jets - 6: over(-130) under(even)
let me save everyone some time and just say that these teams have mediocre defenses, and horrible offenses. the jets' money line preplexes me a bit, but i suspect a push there. buffalo might win only 3 games this year. under on both of these "football teams".

NFC east
new york giants - 9: over(+105) under(-135)
the defense will always be solid with their studs up front and adding lavar arrington, and eli looked like he might take the next step this year, but i hear a lot of things about players getting fed up with coughlin. i guess you hear this every year with a hardass like coughlin, but i feel like there's more talk than i've heard in recent years. and vegas seems to think there's something up here as well...under.

washington - 9: over(-145) under(+115)
second biggest spread on the board. ughh...i hate saying this but there is quite a bit of talent and even more importantly, i was completely wrong about clinton portis. i love that guy this year and i think he'll have a big big year. no i still don't like the qb situation and i definitely don't like any defense that loses someone like lavar arrington, but on paper this team is worth at least 10 wins. over.

philadelphia - 8.5: over(-135) under(+105)
this number offends me. how is this team worth 9 wins? i absolutely do not see it. i mean their defense is pretty good, but not on the same level as carolina or chicago. offense...don't get me started. i'm obviously biased, but who cares. eff the eagles, and give me the under here. if you're in vegas, bet this hard.

dallas - 9.5: over(-140) under(+110)
the one we've all been waiting for, bobby the gook's dallas cowboys prediction. let's see, sixteen games in a season...16 > 9.5, therefore i'll take the over. but seriously, i know the baggage that comes with T.O. but come on, he took the eagles to the super bowl in his first year. he got paid, and he's got a quarterback with a strong arm. the thing is that the bledsoe needs lots of time to be effective and the offensive line is a major question mark. however, what i think is going to happen is that you're going to see the defense really come together, especially those young guys: canty, ware, and spears. i envision a team that was similar to the chicago bears last season that wins on defense except instead of a solid running game keeping the offense going, it will be a wide receiver. guess which one i'm talking about? T.O. will be great, if for no other reason, he's going to be the first option on most plays. don't let bill parcells fool you, he'll try to run alot in the beginning but after watching game film, he's going to realize that T.O. is open a lot and that he's matched up against inferior talent. i do worry about the running game as julius jones took a step back last year, and with no sign of the o-line being any better, this could be the thing to sink the cowboys. if this sounds like a cowboy homer...well duh. it's super bowl or bust this year. o. v. e. r.

ok kids, that's it. i'm off on a three-week, five-stop tour of texas, canada and the east coast. i will not have any access to a computer for an extended period of time, so there's a greater than zero chance that there won't be any blogging at all during this time. everyone enjoy their august and stay cool. i know fredo is going to weigh in, but seriously, anybody else who wants to please weigh in.


Bob said...

since fredo hasn't posted yet, i'm going to go ahead and revise a couple of predictions. is this cheating? sure, but no money has been laid down, and it's my blog so i can do what i want.

the redskins have been horrible in preseason. and fredo and i were talking this weekend, and really, the qb situation is far from being squared away. i'll take the under.

philly on the other hand looks like the defense is ready to go. i'm torn cuz i'm still not sold on the offense but vegas numbers scare the hell out of me now. give me the over here.

alfredo said...

AFC East

New England (10.5) - over. either they collapse in a heap of Belichick mad science or they put together one more good run. there, i really narrowed it down.

Miami (9) - over, and crap is that bad value. take the over on saban curing cancer and inventing anti-gravity pants this season, too.

Buffalo (6.5) - under. boring team, ugly uniforms - pretty much the bizarro dallas cowboys here, meaning God hates them.

NY Jets (6) - under. i didn't realize how high this number was. i'll jump on it this week. that's almost a miracle, it's so easy. (you asked for miracles? i give you the...n...y...jets.)

NFC East

NY Giants (9) - under. welcome back to earth courtesy of mr. schedule, you fuckstick eli manning.

Washington (9) - under. fuck the redskins. how is brunell stil playing? i think the sooner they get someone else in there at qb, the sooner the redskins can narrowly miss the playoffs. chumps.

Philadelphia (8.5) - over. i think that they get some schedule breaks and mcnabb returns to form. they should break out of the gates quickly and then commit football suicide somewhere around weeks 14-16 when they're on the road for three straight weeks against their division.

Dallas (9.5) - over. dallas becomes the first team in nfl history to win 17 games in the regular season as they are given an extra win over the packers. brett favre will say something like, "with my drunk retard goofball interception throwing redneck ass retiring and all, it only seems right to give dallas a win against me for old times' sake. yee-haw!" defense should carry the team through any rough patches as bill parcells has finally recreated his best work from the 80's. like the old doomsday squads, this defense will inspire some kind of new and catchy nickname for people to slap on t-shirts and snort coke with. my suggestion: the 2006 monolith of defense, forced turnovers and untamed aggression with stars on the helmets.