bobby the gook season 3, end of season wrap up + playoff picks

well, no sense in putting it off any longer, here are the final tallies for title of football genius:

Bob vs. Fredo
season record
Winning Pct.
Vegas Round

Bob vs. Erik
season record
Winning Pct.

as we can all see, after a mini-slump fredo went 10-6 to finish up an astonishing 36 games over .500. me on the other hand finished off with a modest week of 9-7 to finish 4 games over .500. now of course in real gambling terms, finishing at .500 actually means that you would lose money since the house always gets its rake. the general consensus is that to win money you need to get at least 55% of your bets right to finish positive. so even by that measure fredo seems to have done very well. however, as we know you would have to be stupid to bet on every single football game every week. in the vegas round, fredo also finished very strong. he ended up winning $565. that's a lot of bob bucks but not enough to bring fredo back to even. even so, however, he finished the season at only -65. in the big picture that is one freaking fun weekend in vegas. me however, finished pretty strong, winning $475 to end the year at +$730, which is an even more fun weekend in vegas. so it would seem that in a sense, fredo and i tied for the title of official football genius of the ragin' asian blog. however, the truth is, we're both football geniuses. fredo and i finished in first place in the santa barbara wide football pool each pocketing a nice bit of change for doing what comes naturally to both of us. damnit we're good.

as an uninteresting sidenote, erik did the best he's done in weeks by going 8-8 to finish 14 games under .500. it takes a little sting out of losing to him in fantasy football, but both fredo and i had pretty low expectations for erik at the beginning of the season, so it shouldn't surprise anyone that i beat him by six percentage points.

overall i'm very pleased with the way that the season turned out. after last year's debaucle, i started to question whether or not my luck and knowledge had maybe run out. i think we can all see that last year was an abberation and that fredo and i are actually still pretty damn good at this thing of ours called handicapping. erik, however, should stick to hockey.

anyways, here are this weekends picks. no money, no contests or points, just picking for fun here.

IND (-7) over kc (o/u - 51)
last year, road teams went 3-1 in the wildcard round, but like i said, last year was an anomaly. peyton will take care of business at home. the defense will still get gashed by LJ, but not trent green. i'm a little worried since the colts aren't blowing people out like they were last year, so they might keep it close, but still, i think peyton is still playing great football this year. and give me the under.

dal (+3) over SEA (o/u - 47)
yeah, i know, there's no reason to have any optimism for the cowboys. but what did you expect me to do? plus i have to take at least one underdog. also i'm gimme the over - big time.

NE (-8.5) over nyj (o/u - 38)
the pats are going to roll like you would not believe. the jets are the biggest mirage in the NFL. most of their wins against crappy teams, and chad pennington at qb. no thank you. i like the over here as well as i think NE will score 30 by themselves.

PHI (-7) over nyg (o/u - 46)
this is the easiest money this week. the giants are horrible. sure they beat the skins last week but look at this team. coughlin, shockey, eli, plaxico, and tiki. this line should be at least ten. there's just no way that the giants are even going to sniff victory. under as well.

in the next few days, we'll go over our pre season over/under picks.


Erik said...

OK, I watched the first half of the pathetic KC-IND game and all I have to say is that Peyton Manning is a huge, enormous, pulsating asshole.

After every failed 3rd down pass (and there were a lot in the 1st half when Manning was choking hard), before the ball even hit the ground, Manning immediately started barking and pointing at his receivers, indicating where they screwed up. Fuck you, Peyton Manning. You do your job, your wideouts will do theirs. Get over yourself.

Seriously, Manning whined worse than I do after losing a hand in poker. Wow.

And I'd like to say that I might have sucked at "handicapping" this year, but we're all allowed one off year before we're declared football retards. I'll be back, as my fantasy prowess clearly demonstrates.

All right, enough of that. Now -- here's your mortal locks for the other three playoff games this week.

SEA over dal - Bob, I'm surprised you didn't mention the Jon Kitna story. Apparently, the greatest Lions QB since Erik Kramer went on Seattle talk radio a few days ago to call out -- by name -- players on the Dallas defense. "I mean," Kitna said, "it looked like number 82 didn't even know where he was half the time." BAM! "Usually you get like 3 or 4 yards when you dump it off to the back, but we were getting like 10 or 12. I wasn't even going through my progressions, I was just looking to see if the back was open." ZINGER!!! So, Dallas can't stop the run, can't stop the pass, and they're facing a pretty potent offense. Yeeeeah. Good luck, kids!

NE over nyj - BORING

PHI over nyg - The best Lions QB until Jon Kitna hasn't been on talk radio recently, but if he could be, he'd call out Giants defenders by name. Plus, the Giants are on the verge of a massive implosion -- would you play for Coughlin?

Here's a bonus lock for you --

Super Bowl XLI:

The Chicago Bears and the San Diego Chargers.

Your NFL Champion:

The Chicago Bears with QB Rex Fucking Grossman, he's gonna come alive just to piss you off, Bob.

Erik said...

Bob you're killing me.

I wont' have a chance to post before the Saturday games start, so here are your guaranteed picks for this weekend's NFL games. I'd like to dedicate these picks to Reverend Doctor Martin Luther King, Jr.

BAL (-3.5) over ind - I can't wait to see Peyton Manning weeping like Tony Romo.

phi (+5) over NO - I think NO wins but not by 5. Philly has the firepower to keep up with these guys, particularly since they're rocking Jeff Garcia.

sea (+9) over CHI - This line is way too big. Chicago wins, of course.

SD (-5) over ne - Now here's a blowout.

bye (-17.5) over DET - Detroit wins, of course, but not by this much.